Sunday, January 30

Disconnected... and utterly erased

1st Entry:

hi guys... i quitted my job on 1525 without telling anything... i was so wasted that i wanted to run away back home just to see my mom and my families... even though in the end it strikes me back cause I lost my room in my house...
(can you imagine not having a room in your own house... DAMN!!!)
but oh well... i guess i'd be mr. "go ahead and use my room" for a while... since my bro's family is using it right now...
but then it was my own mistake that i wanted to run away from this house to NED in the first place...
and after two years... i came back home and found myself in a place i can hardly call home... i still have my old stuff, and my great loving mother... with my good-gracious ignorant father... but there's just too many colors on the house... both my brothers, both my sister-in-laws and their lovely children are all scramming, scourging in the very house I was supposed to live in with my mom... and my dad... he has this "authorithy complex" that he is the LORD of the house and everyone has to BOW to him... (huh?!) but the hell with that... as long as i hold firm my beliefs, and i stood for my truth, i have no fear of what become of me... i lost faith in humanity but i believe in the power of heart.

"being responsible is not just abiding the rules and tasks given upon you nor by tributing to the authorities. with a heart being resposnsible, what at stakes is not freedom, not life, nor physical possessions... it was simply responsibility of the truth and the honesty of the world that might be the last best thing remains till the end of the world" - sietho, Jan 30 2005 (a night before the competition)